In today’s article, I’m going to share a simple but fundamental concept behind goal achievement – the WHAT and the HOW . To get what you want in life, there are two things you have to be clear about:

1. WHAT: What you want. Your goals, dreams, desires, likes.
2. HOW: How to get what you want. Your methodologies, knowledge, techniques, skill sets, action plans.

The order to think about them is first WHAT, then HOW. You have to first discover WHAT you want, then proceed to figure out HOW to get what you want.

For example, say you are unhappy with your job. In this situation, what is your ideal desired scenario? This is your WHAT. Perhaps it is to set up your own contemporary-styled coffee cafe where people can dine at and relax after a busy day. You want to turn it into a renowned cafe across the country with booming business. In time to come, you want to open up other branches, perhaps even internationally. Your HOW is then to continue on in your career for 3 more months to create a savings buffer. At the same time, you will  start linking with people in the cafe industry to learn more from them. You will also be reading related books to understand how to run a successful eatery business and start gathering the resources to get things started.

Sounds extremely simple and clear when we break it down our goals into just 2 aspects . Unfortunately, most people get stuck mid-way, which prevents them from realizing their best life. In my past few months of coaching an array of different people in my school (through 1-1 coaching and workshops), I discovered there are three most common issues blocking people from getting what they want.

Issue #1. Many of us don’t know our WHAT.

It’s alarming, but it’s true. Majority of this group are sleepwalkers who are not fully conscious of why they do what they do and what they really want for themselves. They are dissatisfied and jaded with life, but at the same time they remain stagnant in their situation because they don’t know what they want. When asked about what they want, some may give a short answer or two. Some may reply with an entirely ambiguous answer. Some may resign in jest that they don’t know, then carry on that way. Since they never get to know their WHAT, their lives never quite improve. It remains dissatisfactory and just “okay”.

Issue #2. Many of us are working on others’ WHATs.

There are some who are clear about the WHATs. They channel their energy into the WHAT and make big progress. The HOW is hardly an issue. There may be challenges here and there, but they can always find some way to address them.

There is just one problem though – these aren’t their real WHATs! These are just others’ WHATs – what they have been conditioned to do over time. These are the same people who pursue imposed purposes rather than their real liberated purposes are pursuing others’ WHATs. Imposed purposes refer to purposes which you live by due to external forces or purposes conditioned into you over time. They aren’t what you really want on the inside. Liberated purposes, on the other hand, are self-realized and much more powerful because they come from within you.

Since what they are doing are not their real WHAT, from a results stand-point the progress they make in these goals sometimes just feel empty. For example, someone making big strides in an engineering career. He can be promoted as the Director of the engineering department, but if what he truly loves is music and piano, then there’s not much point in progressing in the engineering career. This was the situation for me before I quit from my corporate job the last year. I was successfully carving out my career in brand management, but what I really wanted was to help people grow and live their best lives.

The tricky thing is, many of them pursue others’ WHATs thinking it’s their WHAT. This is why it’s important to really look into your WHAT to understand it is in line with your life purpose. (Further reading: 7-part Discover Your Real Purpose series)

Issue # 3. Many of us compromise on our WHAT because we are scared by the HOW.

These people have a certain awareness of what they want. However, since they don’t see any way of getting that, they compromise on their WHAT. They reduce their expectations, make do or totally abandon their desires altogether. These are the people who are ruled by their present scenario and practicality rather than their dreams. Over time, life becomes just about sacrificing themselves for the others and going through things for the sake of it. Since they can’t get what they want, they stop thinking about it altogether. Some even deny to themselves they do want it. Eventually they just forget about their WHAT. They become reduced to sleepwalkers of life.

Know Your WHAT First

Uncovering your WHAT is the first step towards living the life of your dreams. Your WHAT is the big rocks of your life. If the big rocks are not in, the small rocks, gravel, sand and water will just be randomly scattered around. They remain that way until your big rocks are put into place.

Ironically, most people don’t think about their WHAT or they compromise on their WHAT because they were thinking about the HOW first. They don’t see any way of getting what they want from where they are. So they think “Why bother?” and just don’t think about it altogether.

However, thinking about the HOW before the WHAT is like putting the carriage before the horse. As you know, you can’t move the carriage forward if the carriage is placed before the horse. The horse needs to be in front to move it. Similarly, your WHAT needs to be in place first. You have to identify what you want first to get it!

An interesting observation is many people often tend to worry about their HOW before they even think about their WHAT. Have you ever done that before? Perhaps your mind generates a laundry list of problems of obstacles you might be facing or potential issues you might encounter. Truth is though, most of the time these are either issues that get resolved by themselves, problems that are over-exaggerated or non-existent problems. If you ever do take the step forward, you will find only about 10% (or less) of them are valid! Unfortunately, most get intimidated by all the problems they “see” in the HOW stage and abandon their WHAT altogether. It’s a huge pity!

If you are always seeing your future from your present situation, you are never going to move too far away from where you are. Rather than worry endlessly about the HOW, know WHAT you really want first! Worry about the HOW later. Once you are done with your WHAT, then you can work on devising your HOW. Doing it the reverse method will just result in you compromising on your WHAT, which isn’t what we want at all.

Example: Donald Trump’s Turnaround

Take the example of Donald Trump. You probably know Donald Trump as the famous, billionaire real estate mogul from The Apprentice reality business series. He is the CEO of Trump Organization, one of the most prominent US real estate organizations, as well as the owner of the Miss Universe organization.

However, there was a time in 1990s when bad decisions he made in his businesses led him into a huge pitfall. Just overnight, he turned from a billionaire to having nearly a billion dollars of debt. At that time, his “friends” and business associates left and turned their back on him. The media, press, people all around him all thought he was finished. It was the lowest point of his life.

What did Donald do? If he had focused on the paths available in front of him, he would never have made it back. Instead, he focused on WHAT he wanted – his ideal vision. He refused to give in to the circumstances before him. Even though the situation was blasphemous, he remained resolute. Even though there were overwhelming odds before him, he stood tough.

As things would have it, within a year, he turned around and emerged tops, with over $3 billion in net worth – 3 times higher than his highest wealth from before his debt which was $1 billion!!!! From a -$1 billion debt to being a billionaire, three times over! It was such an incredible feat that he became listed in the Guinness Book of World Records for having the biggest financial turnaround in history ever!

Example: Getting My Internship

Throughout my life, there have been umpteen times when I achieved what I wanted because I first focused on the WHAT, rather than the HOW.

For example, when I was a year 2 student in University, we were supposed to secure internships for the summer holiday period. At that time, there were many recruitment talks conducted by different companies in the campus. One of them in particular, was this Fortune 100 consumer goods company, which was highly prestigious and renowned throughout the school. Everyone heard of its an arduous selection process and how only a small, pristine group of candidates would be recruited. It was so few that no one ever knew who they were – we only heard about such people through hear-say or word of mouth, and never the people directly. To be honest, the people who did get in were seen as urban legends!

So when the company came into the campus for a recruitment talk, it was not a surprise that the lecture hall which had a capacity of 500 was OVER packed! Seats were fully filled, students were sitting on the alley steps, and then there were those who were standing at the back of the lecture hall. There were even students who were not from the Business faculty who were in the talk as well. To think that all of these people were here with a common objective – to secure the same job, was a little mind boggling. Not to mention that there were 2 other major universities in Singapore too! Everyone was blown away by the presentations and things shared by the employees of the company during the talk.

Like everyone else, I was interested to apply. It was a prestigious Multi-National Corporation, it had terrific benefits, huge career development opportunities, highly dynamic culture and tremendous travel opportunities. In fact, it was renowned in the industry as the dream job for Marketers (and I was a Marketer)! Honestly, ,a career in this company would be like a dream come through.

There was only one problem – the competition. There was only a small number of roles open and probably nearly a thousand people looking to apply – very smart, talented individuals, half of which were probably more qualified and had more experience than I did! For example, a large group of them were third year or MBA students, where I was just a second year student. They had more academic knowledge, past internship experiences and for the MBA students, past work experiences, whereas I had absolutely no experience interning or even any real work experience. Their track records were easily stronger than mine. There were also plenty of other 2nd year individuals who had their own set of achievements and results that made them very strong candidates as well. Honestly speaking, if you were just to objectively calculate the odds, it was like a 0.1% of getting accepted .

However, rather than be intimidated by that, I simply focused on the WHAT – getting the internship. In spite of overwhelming odds, I just applied anyway. I mean, who cares, really? If I tried, I would have a chance of getting in, but if I didn’t I would have zero chance of getting in. As it turned out, I eventually got through and was selected each round of assessment (for a total of 6 rounds!!), ultimately securing the internship!!  I would later go on to do well in the internship and get my pre-placement offer with the company before graduation. This would never have happened if I had been focusing on the HOW initially, rather than the WHAT.

Exercise: Know your WHAT

Let’s now do an exercise to know what your real WHAT is . This involves a communication with your inner self. Depending on how regularly you introspect on your needs, this may take between 15-20 minutes.

Think about these questions and write down the answers on a piece of paper or in a document:

• What do YOU truly want for yourself?
• What are the biggest goals you want to achieve in your life?
• What are the things, when you get them, will bring you tremendous joy and happiness?
• What are dreams you had as a child, but forgot when you were growing up?
• What do you most want to see happen for yourself in the next few years?

Don’t just scan through these questions and casually toss them around in your mind. Really get down to think about WHAT you really want! Just the amount of time and energy you are willing to put into this indicates what you will be able to get out of your life moving forward.

With your answers, make sure they resonate within you. Remember, these are your WHATs, not others’ WHATs!

Bring your WHAT to life

How was the exercise? What are the answers that you got out of the exercise?

Now you know your WHATs, it doesn’t stop there. HOW do you intend to bring them to life? There have been many articles written in this blog on goal achievement. The base series you should check out is 5-Step ESPER Series for successful goal achievement. Supplementary articles include the ones on Goal Achievement category. Use them to devise an action plan towards bringing your WHAT to life.

While the road ahead may not be smooth sailing, the most important thing is every step you take, every thing you do, you are now progressing towards your real WHAT. As long as you continuously work towards your WHAT, you will be closer towards reaching it. When you finally achieve your WHAT, you will find it has been worth every ounce of energy you put into it, and more.

First Step To Get What You Want – Admit You Want It

Today’s article covers the very first step of getting what you want – admit you want it. While this may seem obvious, I see many people around me who don’t get what they want, precisely because they don’t even acknowledge their desires to begin with. These are the self-deniers.

For example, for career, there are so many people out there who have dreams they want to pursue if they have their way – be it setting up restaurants, bakeries, schools, being manga artists, composers, etc. However, the self-deniers choose to stifle themselves by staying on in their suboptimal careers. They give reasons like the job is actually “not bad”, how it helps fulfill some of their needs, they’re quite happy with what they have, and so on.

In the area of relationships, you have singles who deep down wish to be in a relationship with someone they love, but deny it by justifying how they are happy being single. Even for the ones attached, there are those who have already lost their feelings for their partner but remain in the relationship against their better judgment.

Self-deniers never get what they want because they’re simply in a state of self-denial. This self-denial applies for all other areas beyond career or love – be it’s one’s relationship with family, relationship with friends, weight, health, wealth, achievements, etc. They have desires, they have their wants, but rather than being honest to themselves about these goals, they coax themselves into thinking they’re okay with not having them. Sometimes they even claim they don’t really want the goal to begin with.

However, without first admitting that you want your goal, there’s no way to get it. Imagine you’re at Point A. Point B is where you really want to be. If you keep thinking Point A is your desired point, how will you ever move to Point B? What ensues is you living under the illusion that you’re where you want to be. As long as you’re under that illusion, you’ll never get to your ideal scenario at Point B.

How Self-Deniers Come To Be

With every behavior someone displays, there’s always a cause that led to it in the past. Many self-deniers once began with an earnest desire to pursue what they want. However, along the way, some experienced setbacks. Some were bounded by increased obligations in life and became discouraged from chasing their goals. When they couldn’t get what they want, disappointment ensued.

Because the ego’s natural reaction is to protect itself, their self-defense mechanism kicked in. To protect themselves from further hurt, they began to spin all sorts of reasons to get themselves off the goal pursuit. These reasons ranged from “being content”, “accepting” what is, living in “balance”, how life has many “limitations” and they’re doing a great job living within these limitations, how they have other obligations to fulfill, and what not.

In short, these self-deniers “settle“, “accept“, “make-do“, “compromise“, “seek contentment“, “achieve balance“, or whatever hot button words they like to use in their self justification process. After that, they live merrily in their own cocoon of lies for the remainder of their lives. They preach values of “contentment”, “acceptance” and “balance” to just about everyone they meet. For most of the cases, they do such a fantastic job that they convince themselves beyond doubt that they’re really happy with their current situation.

Self-Deniers: Shadows of Their Higher Selves

Who are self-deniers lying to though?

Not their family. Not their friends. Not their colleagues. And certainly not the world out there. All these people have their own lives to lead. They don’t have a personal stake in the choices or decisions that these people make.

At the end of all that justification about how satisfied and happy they are with their life, self-deniers are really just lying to themselves. About who they are. About what they stand for. About what they really want. About their deepest goals and dreams.  And then they just live the rest of their lives being shadows of what they can be.

Maybe you might say – “But isn’t it possible that they’re really happy with what they have?”.

If you’re a self-denier, you might be able to successfully delude yourself, but you can never lie to your subconsciousness. While your conscious self is busy padding your external life with a make-believe feeling of contentment and fulfillment, your higher self is withering from being locked away and denied from living out its true existence. You may speak like you’re happy, act like you’re happy, and even think that you’re really happy, but your energy flow instantly betrays you.

What do I mean by energy flow?

Over the years, I’ve observed my intuition becoming stronger and stronger as I live in increasing alignment with my higher self. My experience in coaching is also making me more intuitive too. Because of that, I’m now able to pick up a lot of things about a person in a short encounter – not from the words spoken, not from the behaviors displayed, but from the energy the person emanates. While this might seem a little abstract, it’s something you can gradually pick up by yourself too.

Think of energy in terms of a running water current. Someone who is living in alignment with his higher self exudes resonance in his energy. The current runs deep, fast, and continuously. There is no blockage or obstacle that prevents the water from flowing.

However, for a person who isn’t living in alignment, his energy doesn’t resonate. In some cases, the original water source may have been cut off and there’s no current at all. This results in a feeling of void. In other cases, there may be an alternate water current that’s running against the original current, leading to a clash in water flow. This results in a feeling of oppression or repression internally.

How To Tell If You’re Denying Your Desires

So how do you tell if you yourself are denying your higher desires? If there is ever a moment in your life where you feel a slightest tinge of dissatisfaction, boredom, jadedness, emptiness, unhappiness or negativity about any area of your life where you normally tell yourself “it’s okay” or “I’m happy with it the way it is“, that’s a strong symptom that you’re living in self-denial. Some may refer it as a “mood swing”, a sudden feeling of depression, or just suddenly going emo.

How do they arise? From being exposed to “mind-opening” contexts that puncture their cocoon of lies. These contexts bring them to awareness of what they really want, or in some cases let them realize they don’t want what they have now. In the area of career, it can be simply the arrival of Mondays, where you dread having to return to work. It can be seeing friends living out his/her dream career and achieving great results. It can also being seeing people achieve things that you would like too. In the area of love, it can be simply seeing happy couples (this happens a lot to many of my friends) or someone you are potentially interested in. In the area of family, it can be seeing a happy family where everyone is interacting harmoniously with each other. And so on.

Apart from that, such feelings can also arise from life changing events, such as death of someone close, a near-death experience, being retrenched, making a career shift, a break-up, losing a friend, etc. Such events have the power of shake someone out of his/her comfort zones and force them into certain realizations (these events usually jolt sleepwalkers out of their slumber too).

How often do these feelings come about? Maybe once a day, or a week, depending on how often you are exposed to those mind-opening contexts. For the chronic self-deniers who are very skillful at avoiding situations that trigger such emotions or repressing their feelings, such feelings might only appear once every few months, every few years, to almost never.

But in the times where this feeling does emerge, it’s undeniable. Self-deniers might feel lousy for the day, then try to cover it up by immersing themselves in work, watching TV, playing games, partying or just sleeping it away. For some, the feeling can be so deep that it sinks them into a prolonged state of depression. For the chronic self-deniers, they might pretend to be oblivious. They continue in their state of self-denial by immersing themselves in things that make them happy and telling themselves how they’re “contented” with their life and what they have now.

Does the problem ever disappear though? No, it doesn’t. This feeling of void will always emerge, time and again in the future. And it’ll never stop until you act on the problem – The problem of denying what you truly want.

Understanding What “Acceptance” Really Means

Don’t try to justify the situation by claiming you’re simply “accepting” what you have. The word “acceptance” has been tainted beyond measure simply because so many people use that as an excuse to explain away their fear or lack of ability. It’s a total cop-out.

What acceptance really means is to accept that the reality before you is the reality. That’s all. To accept doesn’t mean to accept something you don’t want as something you want. That’s not accepting; that’s flat-out lying. So many people misconstrue the meaning of acceptance. By claiming that you’re practicing “acceptance” through finding contentment in the present, you’re just creating an illusion for yourself. An illusion which will prevent you from getting what you truly want.

This means that if you’re a disgruntled employee who wants to pursue a career of your passion, then admit it. If you’re a single who desires to be in a relationship with your special partner, then embrace that desire. If you’re an overweight individual who wants to be in a athletic and trim body, then acknowledge it. If you’re a daughter/son who wishes your relationship with your family is much better, then align yourself with your desires. If you’re a girlfriend/boyfriend who wants to be someone else who is a better fit with your values, then come to terms with this feeling.

While you may want to lie about your desires to protect yourself, realize that these lies arise due to fear. Fear of not getting what you want. Fear of rejection. Fear of failure. Fear of being torn apart. Fear that you’re incapable. Fear of being hurt. And it’s perfectly okay to be fearful. Whatever the fear is, feel it, then face it anyway.

Because only by doing so; Only by embracing your desires can you even hope to get what you want. As they say, the truth will set you free. And it will. If you choose to pretend you’re okay with the status quo; If you continue to want to defend your pride and tell yourself you’re “okay” with what you have now,  it’s never going to lead you to where you want. If anything, that’s the one guaranteed way NOT to get what you want.

Only when you admit to your real desires, then can you start to work toward creating what you really want. Only then will you finally stand a chance of getting what you want.

Take for example my clients. Each of them is creating results they want in their life now precisely because they recognize their life currently doesn’t match their ideals. Rather than sugar coating the reality and pretending they are okay with everything, they took the first, brave step to admit to themselves that they desire something else. And because they did, this gave them the permission to really start working toward what they want.

In one of my favorite cases, my client and I started our sessions in June. At that time, it just happened he was retrenched from his job. Within 2 months though, he secured in a job which matches his ideals. Not only that, he’s now pursuing his passion in baking cakes via an online cake business – something he wouldn’t have thought of doing before our sessions! In another case, my client was teaching in a school, where the environment was not in congruent with his personal values and style. After 2-3 months, he is now teaching in a new school where he’s much happier in, realigned with his innate passion in learning and pursuing it fervently via his multiple interest (drawing, language, teaching). None of them could have gotten what they wanted if they had not first admitted to their real desires.

What Do You Really Want? Admit It

If you are to think about your life now, is there anything you’re not fully honest with yourself on? Some questions to ask yourself:

• What is your ideal life?
• What are your biggest goals and dreams?
• What is your ideal career?
• What is your ideal level of wealth?
• What is your ideal home?
• What is your ideal weight and fitness level?
• What is the ideal family you envision?
• What is your ideal life partner?
• How about other areas of your life? What are your ideal visions for them?

For all these areas, are you living out your ideal visions? If not, first start by admitting your truest desires. Stop lying to yourself and denying what you want. You’ll never get what you want that way. Only after being fully honest with yourself, then can you start working on how to bring them to life (ESPER). While the road may not be easy, the most important thing is this will finally set you on your path towards living your real dreams.

One of my favorite quotes of all time is by Albert Einstein:

“Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

Are you doing something over and over in your life and for some reason or another, expecting different results to manifest? Whenever you want to see a different result – be it a positive change, an improvement in your performance or realization of your goals – you have to do something different from whatever you are currently doing. In goal achievement terms, it’s changing your strategy to reach your desired goal.

Change Your Actions to Get Results You Want

Why is that so? Because whatever the actions you have taken thus far aren’t giving you the results you seek. Say ABC actions have been giving you ABC results. If you want to get XYZ results, you need to adopt XYZ actions. Repeating ABC actions again and again isn’t going to give you XYZ results – It’s just going to give you the same ABC results indefinitely.

Applying this principle to your life goals, this means:

If you have been trying to lose weight but somehow aren’t anywhere near your goal despite everything you have done, you need to overhaul your action plan.

If you are a single looking for your soulmate to no avail, you need to change whatever it is you are doing (or not doing).

If you have been trying to improve your career standing with limited success, you need to change your approach.

If you have been in the same income bracket for the past few years despite wanting to earn more money, you need to do something different to earn a higher income.

If you have been pursuing your ideal career but not making much headway, you need to change your actions.

Change your actions = Best way to initiate desired changes

In certain cases, there may be changes brought about through no direct change in your actions. This change might be due to accumulated effects from your previous actions (e.g., a promotion at work from consistent hard work) or through changes in your external environment (e.g., a manager resigning at work which expedited your promotion).

This doesn’t mean not changing is the best manner to give you desired results. The former shows you could have expedited the change by increasing your effort, which is a change itself. The latter (change in external environment) is too unreliable a way to get what you want. Sitting around and hoping things will miraculously change in your favor is a very reactive manner to live life. It’s much more empowering to get to what you want through your own actions. No matter what situation you are in, you always have a choice in how you act.

Give actions sufficient time to play out first

Of course, this assumes you have given the set of actions sufficient time to play out before changing them. The amount of time will vary on the goal itself. For a weight loss goal, a month should be a good time frame for results to set in. For a start-up, results might take anywhere from 3-6 months or even a year to play out. In cases where results take longer to manifest, instill intermediate time frames to measure the effectiveness of the actions.

Keep effective actions; Remove ineffective ones

Changing your actions doesn’t mean chucking aside everything you have been trying. It’s likely you are experiencing a certain level of success with your current actions. If that’s the case, review these actions, keep the ones which are bringing in the results, throw away those which aren’t working and bring in new actions into the mix. Don’t waste your time doing actions which aren’t bringing you anywhere.

Big changes in actions = Big changes in results

It’s not just about changing your actions too. The magnitude of change also plays a role. The more dramatic the results you seek compared to your current results, the more dramatic the change in actions you need to make. With big actions, comes big results. Small changes in actions lead to small changes in results. Big changes in actions lead to big changes in results.

For example, maybe you have been trying to lose 20lbs in 4 months. You improved your diet by eating more fruits. You increased your activity level by walking more. These changes have brought about a decrease in 2lbs in the past 2 months. While these actions have brought about their own effects, continuing in the same steps probably isn’t going to bring you anywhere near losing 20lbs, ever. To bring about a larger change, you need to add in more dramatic changes, such as transforming your diet into a healthy, lower-calorie diet and setting in a proper exercise regime.

Example: Singles finding their partners

For example, a common goal among many is to find their ideal partner. I know many singles (I’m a single myself too), whereby some are in their 30s, with a small handful in their late 30s. Some are discreet about this desire to find their dream partner. Some are overt about it. Then there’s those who try to avoid the issue and claim they are okay being single.

These people have been meaning to get into a proper relationship but haven’t been able to for some reason or another. If they could have their way, they would want to be attached or married by now. While some have already become skeptical about their state of singlehood, most continue to look toward the future with a glimmer of hope that they will find their partner one day.

(By the way, I’m referring to singles who seek to find their special someone but haven’t been able to do so. There are singles who deliberately choose singlehood as their way of living and I see it as a perfectly fine choice.)

There’s usually one big problem though. Many of them do the exact same actions (or in some cases, inactions) they have been doing in the past few years of their life as they “search” for their soulmate. Engage themselves in their daily routine? Check. Sit around, wondering why they are still single rather than actively work toward their goal of finding their partner? Check. Try to ignore their desire to find someone and pretend it doesn’t matter? Check. Wait for destiny to miraculously sweep their special someone into their life one day? Check.

Why is any of that a major problem? If whatever they have done in the past 10~20 odd years have not led them to their special someone, what’s there to think that they will get different results in the next few decades? More likely than not, they’re going to end up with the same fruitless outcome at the end of 10 years, 20 years, 30 years, 40 years, till their deathbed. If any case, their chances are probably going to get lower and lower as more and more people get attached.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. The last time I did my Myer Briggs profile, it’s a INFP, characteristic of a romantic idealist. I believe in the concept of soulmates. I believe in intertwining fates and interlocking threads of destiny. I believe there is someone special for each of us out there whereby invisible forces of destiny will do their best to bring us together.

But I also believe we need to take action to create the results we want. Destiny and fate may exist, but if you just sit around waiting for destiny to piece everything together, nothing’s going to happen. You have to earn something in order to receive something. Just like the hero in the RPG: He may already have his quest marked out for him, but if he’s just sitting inside the village every day mucking around, that’s all his existence is going to boil down to – nothing. Your life partner isn’t going to fall onto your lap all of a sudden without you doing anything  different. You have to take the necessary actions to trigger the event.

If you are a single and you are nowhere near finding your special someone, it is a major indicator to start doing things differently. For starters, self-improvement is probably the biggest thing you can act on. Think about the kind of person you envision yourself to be (physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually), and work on the areas which you are not there yet. Are you someone you will love unconditionally? Are you someone that your ideal partner will love? Many times people are single because there are something about them which aren’t attracting their desired partners, but more often than not they are too busy looking outward than inward to realize they need to change from within.

Next, change your whole action around. If you haven’t already done so, been put yourself out there and know other singles. Meet up with more people, go to different outings, take part in different interest groups or societies. If you are adventurous enough, join dating agencies, dating sites and/or approach people you have an interest in and get to know them. Basically, just do anything different from the things you have been doing all along.

Example: The Personal Excellence Blog

Another example is my blog. Just 8 months after launching it, The Personal Excellence Blog now has a strong flow of quality traffic (a few thousand/day), is known by many in the personal development industry, has been featured on almost all key media outlets in my country and has scored front pages in major networking sites, including Digg, Delicious and StumbleUpon. It’s performing better than many other blogs of the same theme across different measures – total traffic, unique visitors, page views/visitor, reception among visitors. All in all, it is considered to be highly successful.

While those who have no knowledge of the online industry may think of it as an easily achievable outcome, people who have tried to make blogging a serious venture will know it’s very hard to generate quality traffic, especially due to the oversaturation in websites and blogs in the past few years.

For starters, there are about 70 million blogs out there, with tens of thousands of new blogs set up every day. Within the personal development blogosphere, there are at least a few thousand blogs competing for readership. The low barriers of entry have made it incredibly easy for someone to start up a blog, but extremely difficult for people to succeed. Available internet marketing outlets are already used to death by every single blogger (just to name a few – SEO, commenting in blogs/forums, submitting and promoting in social bookmarking sites, networking with bloggers, submitting to blog carnivals, guest posting).

The reason why The Personal Excellence Blog has been doing well is because I continously change my strategy to get my desired results. I started off with a traffic building plan. Then after 1-2 months, I would check the results of my traffic building efforts. If the results haven’t been achieved, I would review the effectiveness of my strategies. For actions that have been efficacious, I would keep them; For actions which aren’t, I would put them aside. Then, I would research and adopt new methods to add into the mix. I’m always open to try every single method to get traffic – if it’s something I’ve not done before, I’ll be game to just try it out, even just for one time.

All in all, it is through the continuous process of reviewing and changing my actions which have enabled me to achieve the results I have today. If I had just adopted one set of actions and stuck with it the whole time, I’d never be getting the kind of readership and exposure today, and my blog would never have grown to be what it is now.

Start Changing Your Actions

Think about a goal which you have been wanting to achieve with limited success. Then, think about the following questions. Write your answers with a pen and paper:

1. What have you been doing to achieve this goal in the past few months/years?
2. Why haven’t you been able to reach your goal? Have you been trying hard enough? Have your actions have been too confined? List out all the reasons and dig deep into the answers.
3. How can you revise your strategy? What shall you do differently moving forward? For example, look at the people who have been successful in achieving this goal. What did they do? Can you put more effort in your existing steps? What are some new things you can try out? How can you address the obstacles you have been facing? Read 25 Brainstorming Techniques to get new ideas for your strategy.
4. Carry out this new strategy you have designed.
5. Review it a few months from now to measure its effectiveness. If the changes in results are limited, then repeat steps 1-3 as you review your strategy. If you haven’t been able to get the results you want, it just means that the strategy you have been adopting is not on-point. Keep changing it until you finally achieve the results you want.

Remember that as long as you keep reviewing your actions, stick with the most effective methods and try on new actions, you will eventually get the results you want.

What does talent mean to you? There are two main schools of thought on what talent is. The most common thinking is that talent is a natural aptitude a person is born with, usually attributable to one’s genes or assigned by external forces beyond our control. Such a definition makes talent an elusive quality which one has no influence over. If you define talent this way, there’s little that can be done if you think you don’t have talent in an area of interest. You either give up on the goal or settle for a lesser result. Either outcome wouldn’t be optimal.

Then there’s the second school of thought: that while talent is a function of natural aptitude, it’s only a small part of the equation. The remaining, larger part of the equation is through hard work. This means talent is something everyone can develop. This is a much more empowering framework to live by.

10,000 Hours to Develop Talent

In the book Outliers: The Story of Success, Malcolm Gladwell studied the “outliers” – i.e., the most successful people of the world, including sportsmen, business people, musicians and scientists, to understand key factors behind their success. He found the key denominator to all their success isn’t natural aptitude as many like to believe. Having a high IQ doesn’t guarantee success : There is supposedly no difference with in the people’s propensity to success beyond an IQ of 130.

The key denominator is actually hard work. A lot of it, in fact. About 10,000 hours of it. That’s roughly 3 hours every day, for 10 consecutive years, before any one of them began to be defined as the ‘expert’ in their field.

This finding doesn’t come across as shocking. I feel the concept of natural talent has become overrated, right along with self-discipline. Often times, I see people around letting go of their dreams because they do not have the “talent”. Having an innate ability is definitely a nice bonus and great enabler, but the role it plays is lesser than what many may think. While the aptitude to get an initial head start, beyond a certain stage, success becomes increasingly dependent on your attitude and the amount of work you put in, much more so than your aptitude. Hard work becomes the key determinant in the long haul. As Thomas Edison puts it: “Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration”.

As what Malcolm has found, even in fields such as sports and music where many see the key to success as having an innate ability, consistent hard work has proven to be the more superior factor by far. This is the case for many established names, such as Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, Johnny Wilkinson, Bill Gates, Beatles, Beethoven and Madonna. For most (if not all) of them, their hard work started right as a kid. It was through relentless training since young before they attained their level of expertise today.

Here are specific examples of how top performers came to develop their talent through hard work:

#1. Victoria Pendleton’s emphatic gold in the women’s sprint cycling in Beijing came only after humiliating defeat in Athens four years ago. After training for four hours a day, six days a week the 27-year-old finally reaped the rewards. (from Times Online)

#2. Rebecca Adlington, the 19-year-old swimmer who won two gold medals at the Beijing Games, has put in an estimated 8,840 hours of training since the age of 12. (from Times Online)

#3. The Beatles burst onto the world stage in the 1960s, seemingly lifted from their hometown of Liverpool and dropped into the world’s biggest venues. But theirs was not an overnight success. One of the Beatles’ early gigs was performing near military bases in Hamburg, Germany; they would perform for eight hours a day, seven days a week. They did this for 270 days over the course of 18 months. By the time the Beatles enjoyed their first commercial success in 1964, they had performed 1,200 times, which is more than most bands today perform in their careers. When the Beatles first left for Germany, they weren’t very good. But by the time their Hamburg stints ended, they sounded like no other band in the world. They were well on their way to getting in their 10,000 hours. (from RCM)

#4. Generally regarded as a savant or a computer genius, Gates has a 10,000-hour story, too. Gates had the good fortune to attend a private school in Seattle that had a computer club. This was 1968, when most universities did not have a computer club. And Gates’ club didn’t have an ordinary computer — they had an ASR-33 Teletype, one of the most advanced computers of its day. Gates was hooked on computers and began programming in the eighth grade! This led to other experiences in Seattle, and by the time he graduated, Gates had practically lived in the computer lab for five years. He was closing in on 10,000 hours and was ready to take full advantage of the opportunities he soon would receive. (from RCM)

#5. By the age of 20, the best musicians at the Music Academy of West Berlin (as judged by the music professors) had practiced for about 10,000 hours, the “good” ones for about 8,000, and those trained to become teachers for about 5,000. (from Science Spectra)

#6. There are similar examples: Bill Joy, computer legend and founder of Sun Microsystems; Mozart, whose greatest compositions weren’t written until he had been composing for more than 20 years; and it takes roughly 10,000 hours to become a chess grandmaster. (from RCM)

Does that mean everyone who is successful in their niche is so because they have invested the 10,000 hours? No, not necessary. Some might have put in lesser hours; some perhaps more hours. The 10,000 figure should be treated as a reference point. The amount of work needed depends on the magnitude of your goal. The bigger the result you want to achieve, the more hard work required. If you want to be internationally renowned in your field, then 10,000 hours is definitely a minimum commitment.

My Skills

Many people often tell me I have a talent for writing and everything I’m doing. They say they can’t do the same for nuts. I take it as a compliment on my skill levels, but the statement itself a big generalization on what it took to get there. My writing skills came from endless hours of writing. My site building and web design skills came from self-learning since I was in secondary school. My analytical skills came from continuous problem solving and introspection in school and at work.

Was I born with those skills as a baby? No, of course not. Was there a time when I was a greenhorn in those skills? Yes, definitely. I wouldn’t go as far as to say I’ve mastered those skills – I definitely haven’t put in my 10,000 hours and there’s still a huge amount of improvement areas. I see it as an ongoing, improvement process. While my ability to learn things fast has helped in the process, I wouldn’t have been able to develop those skills if not for the many hours put in learning.

Others’ Skills

If I look at all the capable people I know around me, the same applies for them too. All their skills have been acquired through time, hard work and experience. I can’t think of anyone who is just “born” with their skills.

If you ever come across instances where people achieved certain results seemingly due to aptitude than hard work, there’s a good chance hard work has been invested. It’s natural to jump to a conclusion that people success without much work but closer examination usually reveals otherwise.

For example, when I was in school, there would be students who seem to breeze through tests and get great results. What many didn’t know was behind the great results were many extra hours spent in self-studying. Hours of private tuition their parents put them through. Assessment books done ad nauseum. Strong foundation in the subjects which came from earlier schooling years where more hard work was previously invested.

Another example: When I was in my previous job, there would be a handful of people who stood out against others. These were the same people who invested extra time in getting their craft right – whether it was on the work itself, collaboration skills networking, etc. Even in cases where the success was driven by some inherent talent, this talent probably took its roots from his/her past where due diligence was already invested in building those skills.

So why do so many people have a notion of talent as something innate only in certain people (as opposed to everyone)? I personally think it’s because people usually only see top performers when they have achieved a certain level of expertise. They don’t see endless hours invested before this expertise is attained. Without knowing that, it’s easy to jump to conclusions and assume they have always been this good all along. Another hypothesis I have is because the media tends to romanticize the successes of the “have’s” to increase their aspirational level, and one way they do that is by playing up on the successes rather than sharing how they got them.

Start Investing Your 10,000 Hours Today

Do you have a goal where you feel you don’t have the talent to make it? Whether you believe it or not, you already have the aptitude required to achieve your goal. The missing piece of the puzzle is not that you lack talent, but to invest the hard work.

Rather than see talent as something innate in only others, recognize that talent is innate in you as well. You just need to put in the hours to bring it out of you. If you start seeing talent = aptitude + hard work, where aptitude is already present in everyone and hard work is really the variable in the equation, you will have a lot more power over your goals.

Moving ahead:

• What are the areas you want to be talented in? Identify them.
• How do you plan to put in your 10,000 hours? How many hours can you invest every day? Draw out a plan. Your 10,000 hours should go into skill development and leveling up. Read Skills Development for more on this.
• How can you get started on this new plan? Work out your schedule.

In 10,000 hours, you will become the top talent in your field

A few days ago, I was surfing online when I came across someone’s bucket list. It quickly inspired me to create my own bucket list as well and write an article at the same time.

What’s a Bucket List?

If you haven’t heard about the bucket list, it is a wish list of all the goals you want to achieve, dreams you want to fulfill and life-experiences you desire to experience before you die. The term is inspired by the movie The Bucket List (2007) about two terminally ill men (Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman) who set off to achieve a list of things they want to do before they die.

Why Create a Bucket List?

Why have a bucket list? If you don’t live your days by personal goals and plans, chances are you spend most of your time caught up in a flurry of day-to-day activities. Ever feel your days are passing by without any tangible output to speak of? What were your accomplishments in the past 3 months? What are your upcoming goals for the next 3 months? Look at the things you did and the things you’re planning to do next – Do they mean anything to you if you are to die today? Having a bucket list reminds you of what’s really important so you can act on them.

Even if you frequently live by goals or to-do lists, they are probably framed within a certain social context e.g., performance, career, health (Read Gold, Silver and Bronze Tasks on how to create effective to-do lists). A bucket list opens up your mind to set totally context-free goals where you list down anything and everything you ever wanted to do, no qualifiers needed.

It’s just like planning ahead all the highlights you want for YOUR whole life. Even though goal setting is already my staple activity, I still found many new things to do while I was writing on my bucket list. It was an incredibly insightful exercise. What’s more, coming up with the list it gave me a whole new layer of enthusiasm knowing what’s in store ahead!

The objective of creating a bucket list isn’t to instill some kind of a race against time or to create aversion towards death. I don’t see our existence to be limited to just our physical years on earth – I see our physical lifespan is but a short speck of our entire existence which spans across an infinite amount of time. The whole point of a bucket list is to maximize every moment of our existence and live our life to the fullest. It’s a reminder of all the things we want to achieve in our time here, so that instead of pandering our time in pointless activities, we are directing it fully toward what matters to us.

Create Your Bucket List

If you don’t have a bucket list, I highly recommend you to create one. How much does it cost? Probably 30 minutes to an hour, or more if you get really caught up in the writing . What do you gain? Significant clarity and focus on what you want from your life. It’s an invaluable exchange.

If you already wrote your bucket list before, take the opportunity to review it. See if there are new items you want to add-on. If so, add them in. Check if all the items listed are still relevant. If not, remove them.

If you are curious, you can check out my bucket list before you start off

Now, take out your pen and paper or open up a text editing document. You can check out the following sites where people publicly share their bucket lists: 43 Things, Your 100 Things, Barefoot List, My Life List.

Start writing down what comes to mind as you read these questions:

• What if you were to die tomorrow? What would you wish you could do before you die?
• What have you always wanted to do but haven’t done yet?
• What will you do if you have unlimited time, money and resources?
• Any countries, places or locations you want to visit?
• What are your biggest goals and dreams?
• What do you want to see in person?
• What achievements do you want to have?
• What experiences do you want to have / feel?
• Are there any special moments you want to witness?
• What activities or skills do you want to learn or try out?
• What are the most important things you can ever do?
• What would you like to say/do together with other people? People you love? Family? Friends?
• Are there any specific people you want to meet in person?
• What do you want to achieve in the different areas: Social, Love, Family, Career, Finance, Health (Your weight, Fitness level), Spiritual?
• What do you need to do to lead a life of the greatest meaning?

Come up with as many items as you can. The items should be things you have not done yet. Don’t stop until you finish listing at least 101 things! If you find yourself stuck, chances are you are mentally limiting/constraining yourself. Release those shackles – Remember, this is a list of everything you want to achieve, do, see, feel and experience in your life. Check out the next section for added inspiration.

101 Things to Consider for Your Bucket List

Here are 101 bucket list items to consider for your bucket list . Some of the items might spark off your inspiration for other things too!

1. Travel all around the world
   • All the countries in the world
   • Visit all the Wonders of the World
   • 1001 places to see before you die
2. Learn a new language
3. Try out a new profession in a different field
4. Achieve your ideal weight
5. Run a marathon
6. Take part in a triathlon
7. Take up a new sport. Some examples:
   • Technique sports: Archery, Golf, Bowling, Billiard, Skateboarding, Skating, Roller-blading, Ice skating
   • Water sports: Water rafting, Kayaking, Wakeboarding, Sailing, Scuba diving, Snorkeling, Swimming
   • Group sports: Soccer, Rugby, Baseball, Basketball, Ultimate frisbee
   • Racket sports: Squash, Badminton, Tennis, Table tennis
8. Go skiing
9. Learn horseback riding
10. Resign from a job you don’t like
11. Pursue your passion.
12. Start your own business doing something you love
13. Achieve financial abundance with your passion
14. Connect with all your teachers from your past schools – college, high school, junior high, all of it. Let them know how they have shaped your life.
15. Identify someone who has inspired you the most in your life. Let him/her know how much he/she has inspired you
16. Be a mentor to someone
17. Learn a strategy game
18. Do an extreme sport – Bungee jump, Skydiving, Parachuting, Paragliding, Ice climbing
19. Climb a mountain
20. Give a heartfelt surprise to someone
21. Make a difference in someone’s life
22. Perform a kind deed to at least 5 strangers without expecting anything in return
23. Write a book on something that means a lot to you
24. Fly in a hot-air balloon across a country
25. Sing your favorite song to an audience
26. Offer your service to a humanitarian cause
27. Make friends with at least 5 strangers on the street
28. Experience a sunset
29. Experience a sunrise
30. See the Northern Lights
31. Witness a solar eclipse
32. Go stargazing
33. Plant your own tree and watch it grow
34. Own a pet (or more if you desire!): dog, cat, rabbit, hamster, tortoise, fish, snake, frog, etc
35. Do public speaking in front of 10,000 people
36. Write a letter to at least 3 of your closest friends to let them know how much they mean to you
37. Throw a mega party
38. Get a complete makeover (change everything, from your hair style, hair color, image, clothes) and get a different look:  one which you would never have thought of trying!
39. Learn wine appreciation
40. Join a social etiquette class and further refine your mannerisms
41. Be a matchmaker: Introduce your single friends to each other (the rest is up to them!)
42. Go on a blind date! (for the singles!)
43. Go for future education in a different specialization
44. Play a (new) musical instrument: Piano, Violin, Harmonica, Flute, Guitar, Drum, Trumpet
45. Win a lucky draw
46. Take up dancing: Salsa, Line dance, Tap dance, Tango, Ballroom dancing, etc
47. Learn a martial art
48. Go on a road trip
49. Go backpacking across at least 10 locations
50. Pack your bags and set off for a random location with no itinerary planned at all
51. Go swimming with dolphins
52. Live in a different country for at least 6 months
53. Act in a film (self production or otherwise)
54. Get featured on TV/radio/print/newspapers for an achievement you are proud of
55. Knit a scarf
56. Create your dream home (Read: Does Your Room Inspire You?)
57. Whip up the best meal ever for your loved ones
58. Bake a cake for someone special
59. Go deep into the heart of Mother Nature. Go trekking in a rainforest; Camp out in the wilds; Walk in a valley; Visit a waterfall; Swim in an ocean; Walk in a valley
60. See snow (if you haven’t before)
61. Live through 4 seasons of the year – Spring, summer, autumn, winter
62. Read a book on a subject you’d never have thought of reading
63. Volunteer at a hospice
64. Fly a kite
65. Fall asleep on grassy plains
66. Call the customer service (of a service provider you like) just to thank them for the great service
67. If you are a non-vegetarian, try out vegetarianism for 21 days and experience it for yourself.
68. After that, try veganism
69. Followed by raw veganism. Then conclude which is the best diet for you.
70. Fold a 1,000 origami cranes and give them to someone special.
71. Conquer your biggest fear
72. Go snorkeling and experience marine life up close
73. Tell at least 10 people about your bucket list and encourage them to do the same
74. Go on a meditation retreat
75. Experience an OBE (out of body experience)
76. Start a social movement on a cause you believe in
77. Watch cherry blossoms in Japan
78. Get closure on all your hurt, grievances and unhappiness of the past
79. Bury the hatchet with all the enemies / people you had conflict with in the past or now
80. Organize a picnic outing
81. Do something completely crazy and out of character
82. Fly first class
83. Hit bullseye on a dartboard
84. Visit a volcano
85. Fly in a helicopter
86. Have dinner with someone you had only dreamed of meeting
87. Tell your parents (and siblings too if you have them) that you love them.
88. Ride a roller coaster
89. Go on a cruise in the sea
90. Try out front-line customer service jobs such being a waiter/waitress for a month just for the experience
91. Fall in love
92. Be in love!
93. Get on a romantic getaway
94. Do a somersault
95. Visit a castle in England
96. Change the world
97. Help someone in need
98. Learn sign language
99. See the Mona Lisa in Louvre (Paris)
100. Go to a costume party and dress up as your fantasy character
101. Gain enlightenment

Here are some sites you might want to check out for inspiration as you create your bucket list:

• 43 Things
• Your 100 Things
• Barefoot List
• My Life List
• BBC 50 Things To Do Before You Die
• Creating a Bucket List

Get Into Action!

After you finish your bucket list, here’s what to do next:

• Start acting on them! Plan out the successful path towards these goals – For this, read my 7-part Successful Goal Achievement series.
• Be reminded of the list all the time. Use environmental reinforcement – put them up in a prominent spot where you will see them every day / very regularly. Set it as your wallpaper, pin it on your noticeboard, print it out, stick it on your wardrobe/locker.
• Share them with your family and friends. Inspire them to create their own bucket list too! This way, you also create accountability to your own bucket list.
• Don’t limit your bucket list items to a certain definition. Sometimes opportunity present itself in a totally different manner. Keep your eyes peeled! The universe will start throwing things your way.
• Review regularly. Cross out the list of things after you do them. See if some of the items have become irrelevant and if there are new things you want to add. Once every 3 months should suffice.

Why Environment Plays A Role in Achieving Your Goals

Some people have no problem setting goals, but they do not rope in strategies to achieve their goals. They think goal achievement is all about relying on (a) brute force and (b) sheer desire. While both factors are very important, they can only get you that far, especially for larger goals. There are two reasons:

Firstly, motivation is a fleeting quality. Your motivation fluctuates within a certain median, depending on your level of consciousness, who you are with, what you are doing, the experiences you are faced with. While you may experience moments or periods of peak motivation, this peak motivation does not last for an extended period of time. More reliable methods are needed to achieve our goals.

Secondly, your environment largely determines how your energy is utilized. For example, suppose you have water, a mug and a basin. What happens when you pour the water into the mug? Water, having no definite shape, takes the shape of the mug. How about when you pour it into a basin? The water will take the shape of the basin. And what if you pour the water onto the ground? It will become a large puddle, with no particular shape.

In this analogy, your energy is like water; Your environment is like the container holding the water. If your environment is well structured, your energy will be channeled into appropriate avenues. If you have a environment that has no structure, your energy will probably be randomly scattered all over the place. With the right environment/platform, your energy becomes effectively utilized such that you achieve your goals much faster.

If your environment is not conducive towards achieving your goals, you will be wasting a lot of energy trying to go against it every day. If you are trying to lose weight, an unconducive environment will be one where you are constantly surrounded by fatty food, fast food restaurants, people who like to eat, people who don’t exercise and gourmet magazines/TV programs. You might be able to get through 1 day unscathed based on discipline alone, but beyond that it is an excessive waste of your energy to have to overcome the same stimuli every day. Rather than doing that, it is more effective to change the environment/stimuli altogether and replace it with environment that aids you in your goal, such as joining weight loss communities, exercise programs, stocking up your fridge with healthy food, etc.

The same applies whether you are trying to cultivate good habits, earn more money, increase your performance, get promoted, gain more sales, improve time management, wake up early, quit coke, improve your posture and any other goals.

For those who have read my previous article on 21 days to cultivate good habits, you may have experienced a spike in motivation when you first read the post. Maybe your intended habit was to wake up early at 5am. So for the first few days, you relied on the motivational high to wake up early. 1st day, woke up at 5am. Felt absolutely awesome. 2nd day, woke up at 5am. Felt terrific. 3rd day, 4th day, 5th day… you started to slip away from your goal. Then gradually, you got to the point where the initial motivation dissipated. Your sleeping schedule became exactly the same as when you first started. Dejected, you decided to sign off on that goal altogether, thinking you were not meant to be an early riser.

If you only planned to accomplish the 21 day program through sheer motivation, it wouldn’t be a surprise if you were unable to nail down the habit in those 21 days. Relying on the initial burst of motivation can only get you so far. You need to use that spike in the beginning to create the environment to ensure your success.

How I Use Environment For My Goals

For example, when I wanted to try out being a vegetarian 2 years ago, I spent a few days setting up an environment that is conducive for my goals. I went to buy a blender, so I could easily make my own fruit smoothies. I went to the supermarket and stocked up on vegetarian food so I would have a constant food supply at home. I did up a goal sheet for my vegetarian goal, writing out my motivations for trying out the vegetarian diet and plastering the sheet with pictures of nice, appetizing vegetarian food. I set my desktop wallpaper with a picture of a whole variety of juicy, fresh fruits. I told the people around me that I was going to try out vegetarianism for the next 1 month, so they would be walking reminders of my goal. I joined vegetarian online communities to acquaint with like-minded folks. I placed bookmarks of vegetarian sites in my browser.

All these were done so I would be able to stick to a vegetarian diet for the entire month. And because I created the right, conducive environment to achieve my goals, I was able to hit my goal, surprisingly easy. And I never looked back ever since.

Here are other examples where I created/leveraged on my environment to achieve my goals:

• In my ongoing plan to improve my fitness level, I joined weekly kickboxing classes, frisbee sessions and badminton sessions with friends. By joining these groups which have recurring, weekly activities, I’m reminded and compelled to join the sessions by virtue of my membership.
• I joined Vipassana 10-Day Course because I wanted to nail in my habit to meditate. Being immersed in such an intensive environment, with the proper facilities and people to guide me along, enabled me to easily integrate the habit into my life when I came back.
• Being self-employed, it’s easy to slip into a mode of stagnancy if I’m not watchful. As countermeasures, I join my partners in their office to work there once a week, I regularly meet up with people in the industry as a source of inspiration and ideas, I lock in my coaching commitments for rolling 2 months so I will need to commit myself to these coachees in that period, I make announcements of my plans at my blog/at events so there is an increased level of accountability, among others.

Create the Best Environment

Even with an environment enables you to achieve your goals, there is always room to improve it such that it’s letting you achieve your goals in the fastest possible manner. For example, if you want to reach the 20th storey in a building, the facilities in the building will affect how fast and how much work you need to put in to get to the 20th storey. If your building only has stairs, you need to climb through 20 whole storeys, perspiring and panting, before you can reach your destination. If your building has escalators, you can reach the 20th storey with minimal movement on your part. If your building has an elevator, you can sail your way up to the top in a matter of minutes.

Likewise, if your goal is to have a toned up body, the degree to which your environment is conducive to your goal will determine how successful you are. If you are just going to sign up for a weekly abdominal class at the gym, the results you can see is going to be lesser compared to if you sign up for the class, sign up for another aerobics class, get a membership at a gym with good body-training facilities and get a personal trainer all at the same time.

There are many different components in your environment you can play around with, such as the following:

• Your physical environment. This includes your workplace, your office, your home, your room, places you go to or even the country you live in.
• Your computer – specifically, what you have on your desktop, your favorites/bookmarks and your post-it notes, since computer has become a staple in our lives
• Communities you are a part of, both online and offline
• People you hang around with
• Anything that’s part of your routine, such as classes you join (recreation or for self-improvement purposes)

By changing any of the variables, you will see experience different results even when exerting the same energy. Change all of the variables, and you will experience dramatic results.

Creating your best environment includes any one or a combination of the 3 steps below. The better your environment is, the better it can help you in your goals.

(1) Using existing environment.

Say you decide to lose weight this month. You have a blender you normally use to make milk smoothies. Rather than using the blender to make your usual smoothies, you use it to make healthier, fruit and vegetable smoothies instead. You may also have a swimming pool at your house which you never use. Now, you can leverage it by swimming regularly there.

(2) Modifying your environment.

Using the same weight loss goal example, modifying your environment includes: Encouraging your friends to join you in losing weight. Stocking up your fridge with healthy food. Putting up posters of thin, athletic people around your room. Setting your desktop wallpaper with an aspirational model. Writing out your goal and placing it in front of you. Throwing out your larger size clothes and filling out your wardrobe with right-sized or smaller sized clothes in preparation for your new weight.

(3) Moving yourself to a new environment.

Sometimes, this method is the most effective if it’s too troublesome to modify your environment. Join a weight loss club. Join exercise programs. Get a gym membership. Move to a new neighbourhood where there are only healthy eateries and no fastfood.

Think about one of the top goals you have currently and ask yourself these 3 questions:

(1) What are the ways your current environment can support you in your goal?

(2) How can you change your environment in such a way that it best helps you achieve your goal? (Read: Does Your Room Inspire You?)

(3) What other environments can you leverage on to generate the best momentum towards your goals?

By strategically using your environment for your goals, your goal pursuit process will become much more seamless. Have fun creating the best environment for your goals